Sunday, January 11, 2009
i dont know how to put the past 11 days of 2009 into words.
cant find the right vocabularies to describe the tantrum that i've been throwing within myself.
or even to god that is.
i kinda stepped into the new year with worries, uncertainties, feeling like a control freak where i dont have absolute control over many things in my life.
and who knows how much i was feeling except god cause at some point in time,
i'm not even sure why i just cant seem to kill the worry bug.
sorry jia if it worried you quite a bit for the past 2 weeks
but yea, god answered your prayers didnt he.HAHA.
and then the plan to rescue me out of my pity party began with psalm 23.
2 weeks of god knocking sense into me.
and then songs that tugged the strings of my heart,
clearly reflecting what i was feeling but i just didnt know it.
like ouch yea?
and i somehow somehow got hold of the book with an analogy of me being in a garden maze.
what i faced at every turn is a 10 feet tall wall.
and i just lead my self to dead ends after dead ends.
and there was god.
on a ladder, overseeing the entire maze.
where i should turn, where i should go, he gave me directions.
and all i got to do is trust his directions and obey.
sounds simple. but i know it's not that simple.
so. ruminate. and we'll see how.
at least i think i'm taking things as they come.
not because i'm ignorant.
but i'm trusting god that things will still turn out fine like always.
happy birthday dear friend!
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